Tag: news

absurd politics, Cultural Meltdowns, democrats, Democrazy, Donald Trump, Politics, Washington absurdity

Democrats Ditch Trump’s Triumph for Their Own ‘State of the Swamp’ Circle Jerk: A Treasonous Toddler Tantrum in Tuxedos

While President Trump prepares to deliver his 2026 State of the Union address from the House floor, a coalition of Democrats is staging their own rival spectacle across town — a swamp-themed “rebuttal” critics are calling more performance art than policy. As one side fills the Capitol chamber, the other fills wine glasses, proving once again that in Washington, governance now competes with branding. Continue reading Democrats Ditch Trump’s Triumph for Their Own ‘State of the Swamp’ Circle Jerk: A Treasonous Toddler Tantrum in Tuxedos

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
Politics, voter outreach, Elections, Washington absurdity, Democrazy, Washington DC

Capitol Mystery: Is Mitch McConnell Being Operated by Remote Control?

In 2026, rumors circulate that Senator Mitch McConnell has been “functionally offline” while his staff manipulates the legislative process to block the SAVE Act. Various potential puppet masters, including Senate leaders and the parliamentarian, influence actions silently, revealing a system designed to stall bills, suggesting the Senate operates independently of McConnell. Continue reading Capitol Mystery: Is Mitch McConnell Being Operated by Remote Control?

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absurd politics, Donald Trump, Elections, Politics, S.H.I.T.E. Paper

BREAKING: New Study Finds 12 Million “Closet Trump Democrats” Living Double Lives, Hiding MAGA Hats in Recyclable Tote Bags

A recent poll reveals that many registered Democrats secretly support Donald Trump but fear social repercussions from friends and community. This “Closet MAGAcrat” phenomenon highlights a culture of political concealment linked to social survival, exacerbated by pressures from peers and the psychological influence of figures like Hillary Clinton. Continue reading BREAKING: New Study Finds 12 Million “Closet Trump Democrats” Living Double Lives, Hiding MAGA Hats in Recyclable Tote Bags

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
democrats, Democrazy, Satire

The People’s State of the Onion

Democrats recently launched the People’s State of the Onion, an alternative to the State of the Union that emphasizes emotional expressions over factual reporting. Sponsored by various activist groups, it aims to critique the current presidential administration while hosting by influential figures. This approach raises questions about political norms and the acceptance of election results. Continue reading The People’s State of the Onion

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
absurd politics, Culture & Absurdity, Sports & Whatever

Stephen A. Smith Announces 2028 Presidential Run, Vows to “Fix This Nation the Same Way I Fixed the Knicks”

Stephen A. Smith is considering a 2028 presidential run, showcasing his trademark debate style. He criticizes both major parties, suggesting bold, unorthodox policies, like replacing the State of the Union with a monologue and demanding accountability from Congress. His outsider status and intense delivery could revolutionize political debates, captivating audiences nationwide. Continue reading Stephen A. Smith Announces 2028 Presidential Run, Vows to “Fix This Nation the Same Way I Fixed the Knicks”

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
Elections, Politics, voter outreach, Washington absurdity

Swalwell, Schiff Demand Exemption From SAVE Act After Realizing It May Require Them to Show Up to Vote

Eric Swalwell and Adam Schiff have requested a legislative exemption from the SAVE Act, fearing it may set a precedent requiring proof of Congress members’ presence to validate votes. They advocate for flexible participation methods while expressing concerns about increased voter verification impacting democratic access. Their proposed act seeks to redefine attendance. Continue reading Swalwell, Schiff Demand Exemption From SAVE Act After Realizing It May Require Them to Show Up to Vote

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
absurd politics, Celebrity, Maryland, Politics, Satire, State & Local

EXCLUSIVE: Trone’s ICE Protest Attendance Upgraded to Phase II Invisibility — Now Featuring 5G Hologram Cena Units

David Trone’s campaign responds to criticism about staff absence at an ICE protest, claiming they operated in “Cena Mode” using John Cena-inspired clones for invisibility. This satire suggests innovative tactics like “Quantum Protest Presence” and highlights mixed public reactions, with supporters praising efficiency while skeptics question legitimacy. Continue reading EXCLUSIVE: Trone’s ICE Protest Attendance Upgraded to Phase II Invisibility — Now Featuring 5G Hologram Cena Units

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
absurd politics, democrats, Democrazy, Politics, State vs. Federal Politics

After Trump Diss, Democratic Governors Flee to Jackson Hole for “Alternative Dinner” With Supreme Commanders Soros and Clooney

After being excluded from a White House dinner, Democratic governors will host their own event in Jackson Hole featuring notable figures like George Soros and George Clooney. Their gathering promises a more inclusive atmosphere with a locally sourced menu and discussions focused on socialism. Organizers insist this is not a protest. Continue reading After Trump Diss, Democratic Governors Flee to Jackson Hole for “Alternative Dinner” With Supreme Commanders Soros and Clooney

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
absurd politics, Democrazy, Politics, Satire, Sports & Whatever

No Escaping the Scoreboard: How American Sports Hijacked Budget Season

The intertwining of sports and politics has grown pronounced, with lawmakers increasingly referencing sports culture during discussions on budget and fiscal discipline. Instead of productive debates, sessions resemble chaotic sporting events, with bipartisan jabs and metaphorical excess. Ultimately, budgets are passed amid a backdrop of disillusionment, leaving the national debt unaddressed. Continue reading No Escaping the Scoreboard: How American Sports Hijacked Budget Season

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
Donald Trump, Maryland, Politics, Satire, State vs. Federal Politics, Washington absurdity, Washington DC

Wes Moore Discovers New Theory: Maybe It’s the Job Performance, Not the Melanin

Maryland Governor Wes Moore reflects on his absence from a governors’ dinner hosted by Donald Trump, contemplating whether it stems from his performance rather than racial or systemic factors. While some advisors urged him to emphasize race, Moore entertained the notion that invitations are based on effectiveness, highlighting a rare moment of accountability in politics. Continue reading Wes Moore Discovers New Theory: Maybe It’s the Job Performance, Not the Melanin

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment