REAL OR FAKE: The Wes Moore Edition

“Real or Fake” is a political satire game featuring Maryland Governor Wes Moore. Contestants navigate statements about his life, questioning their truthfulness. With rounds focusing on military accolades, academic claims, and biographical discrepancies, the game emphasizes confusion and scrutiny in politics, ultimately challenging perceptions of honesty and resume embellishment. Continue reading REAL OR FAKE: The Wes Moore Edition

Santa’s New Naughty List: This Year, Bad Kids Get Windmills Instead of Coal

Santa Claus has replaced traditional coal with eco-friendly punishments for misbehaving children, introducing items like windmills and solar panel kits. This shift aims to promote sustainability and environmental awareness. Reactions from kids and parents vary, with many preferring coal over the practical challenges of renewable energy gifts, despite Santa’s educational intentions. Continue reading Santa’s New Naughty List: This Year, Bad Kids Get Windmills Instead of Coal

While Trump Commissions Destroyers, Newsom Commissions Bills

Donald Trump announced the commissioning of new U.S. Navy destroyers named after him, designed to project American military power. In response, California Governor Gavin Newsom introduced a series of legislative bills targeting economic stability. While Trump focuses on defense, Newsom’s initiatives may threaten affordability for Californians, showcasing two contrasting political strategies. Continue reading While Trump Commissions Destroyers, Newsom Commissions Bills

Maryland Commissions New Study to Determine Whether Last Study Was Ready to Be Studied

Maryland has once again proven its commitment to evidence-based inaction, as Governor Wes Moore announces a brand-new study to determine whether the last study was sufficiently prepared to be studied. Officials insist it’s not a delay—it’s “sequencing.” Continue reading Maryland Commissions New Study to Determine Whether Last Study Was Ready to Be Studied

🐞 DOMESTIC SURVEILLANCE: THE FLIES HAVE EYES 🐞

A former dishwasher believes flies are part of a deep state surveillance operation, experiencing paranoia as they multiply and refuse to leave him alone. He suspects their capabilities extend beyond mere pestering and writes to officials for help. Ultimately, he warns about their presence and the threat they represent to personal freedom. Continue reading 🐞 DOMESTIC SURVEILLANCE: THE FLIES HAVE EYES 🐞

Citizenship-Affirming Care? Democrats Now Pushing “Legalization Surgery” for Illegal Immigrants

In a dazzling feat of medical and political innovation, Democrats have unveiled their latest passion project: citizenship-affirming care. Why bother with borders or boring paperwork when you can just inject a little U.S.A. directly into the bloodstream? While Republicans are still trying to figure out whether this is an SNL sketch or actual legislation, progressives insist this is a breakthrough in “identity-based immigration.” After all, if you feel American, why shouldn’t a government-funded operation make it official — preferably before the next election. Continue reading Citizenship-Affirming Care? Democrats Now Pushing “Legalization Surgery” for Illegal Immigrants

BREAKING NEWS: Judges Demand Therapy After ADR Collapse

America’s Alternative Dispute Resolution (ADR) system collapsed, resulting in judges’ confusion and panic as they struggled to adapt to traditional trials. Eyewitness accounts depict chaotic scenes in courthouses. Both judges and attorneys face challenges adjusting to constitutional requirements, prompting calls for emotional support and retraining to navigate the new legal landscape. Continue reading BREAKING NEWS: Judges Demand Therapy After ADR Collapse

BREAKING: Mr. Wiggles Trapped in Existential Hell After Attempting to Cross American Legion Bridge at Rush Hour

In Montgomery County, Mr. Wiggles, a satirical clown lawyer, became trapped for seven hours on the American Legion Bridge during rush hour. Armed with a kazoo and balloon animals, he faced traffic woes and absurd hallucinations. After finally crossing into Virginia, he proposed a “Honk lane” for improved traffic flow and vowed never to attempt the bridge again. Continue reading BREAKING: Mr. Wiggles Trapped in Existential Hell After Attempting to Cross American Legion Bridge at Rush Hour

CLOWNCAST AWAY: Mr. Wiggles Devastated After Circus Declares “No Clowns Day” in Stunning Act of Emotional Betrayal

The Grand Royale Traveling Circus held a No Clowns Day, causing devastation for longtime clown Mr. Wiggles. He protested silently while others reacted with mixed feelings. Critics labeled the ban as institutional clownphobia. Although normal operations resumed, emotional damage lingered, prompting Wiggles to file a grievance, advocating for clown rights and dignity. Continue reading CLOWNCAST AWAY: Mr. Wiggles Devastated After Circus Declares “No Clowns Day” in Stunning Act of Emotional Betrayal

🏆 Montgomery County, Maryland: Virtue Signaling Capital of the World™

Montgomery County, Maryland, prioritizes symbolic gestures over practical governance. Despite a multitude of resolutions and bans, real issues like crumbling infrastructure and affordable housing are neglected. The county focuses on moral superiority and public image, often at the expense of citizen needs, resulting in superficial legislation and ongoing challenges. Continue reading 🏆 Montgomery County, Maryland: Virtue Signaling Capital of the World™