Category: Urban Absurdity

absurd politics, Maryland, Politics, State, State & Local, Urban Absurdity

Annapolis Takes Bold Climate Action, Fines Snow for Obstructing Bike Lanes

Annapolis has fined Snow $1,250 for obstructing bike lanes and sidewalks, highlighting a commitment to climate accountability. While Snow plans to contest the violation, city officials emphasize the importance of impact over intent. A new Seasonal Accountability Task Force will be established to address future issues related to snow and transportation equity. Continue reading Annapolis Takes Bold Climate Action, Fines Snow for Obstructing Bike Lanes

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
Cultural Meltdowns, Culture & Absurdity, public safety, Urban Absurdity

When Everything Is an Emergency, Nothing Is: The Rape Whistle Industrial Complex

When a life-saving alarm becomes a protest noisemaker, the signal gets lost. In the age of performative outrage, the sound meant to summon help is increasingly dismissed as background noise—leaving real emergencies unheard. Continue reading When Everything Is an Emergency, Nothing Is: The Rape Whistle Industrial Complex

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
absurd politics, New York, Urban Absurdity

Carhartt Communism: When a Jacket Does All the Governing

In a recent snowstorm, New York’s response was criticized when politician Zohran Mamdani donned a Carhartt jacket as a fashion statement rather than taking action. This display highlighted a trend of superficial solidarity among leaders, prioritizing image over effective governance. New Yorkers faced real struggles, while styled politicians offered only empty symbolism. Continue reading Carhartt Communism: When a Jacket Does All the Governing

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
absurd politics, Government Dysfunction, immigration, Minnesota, Urban Absurdity

When Local Egos Block Federal Badges

Governor Tim Walz and Minneapolis Mayor Jacob Frey have faced criticism for treating public safety as a messaging exercise, leading to increased crime. Their reluctance to cooperate with federal law enforcement has created confusion and negligence, prioritizing political ideology over effective governance while leaving communities vulnerable to violent crime. Continue reading When Local Egos Block Federal Badges

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
crime, immigration, Satire, Urban Absurdity

ICE Arrests Hundreds of Violent Five-Year-Olds Linked to Tren de Aragua, Grandmothers Busted as Getaway Drivers

ICE confirmed hundreds of “extremely dangerous” five-year-olds tied to Tren de Aragua were taken into custody this week, while their grandmothers were allegedly busted running the getaway cars—sending national media scrambling to determine whether juice boxes qualify as mitigating evidence. Continue reading ICE Arrests Hundreds of Violent Five-Year-Olds Linked to Tren de Aragua, Grandmothers Busted as Getaway Drivers

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
Culture & Absurdity, Satire, Urban Absurdity

Exploding Trees Threaten Midwest as Winter Finally Decides to Be Extra

Meteorologists have warned of a new phenomenon called “Exploding Tree Risk” in the Midwest, where trees may burst due to extreme cold causing sap to freeze. Residents are advised to keep their distance from trees. While the threat is serious for the trees, it has become a source of humor and resignation among locals. Continue reading Exploding Trees Threaten Midwest as Winter Finally Decides to Be Extra

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
Cultural Meltdowns, Culture & Absurdity, economy, Minnesota, State, Urban Absurdity

Minnesota Faith Leaders Urge Residents to Observe “Sacred Friday” by Absolutely Not Going to Target

Clergy in Minnesota are urging residents to refrain from shopping on Fridays as an act of spiritual resistance against consumerism. A rally on January 23 aims to promote contemplation over retail participation for one day. Critics note the challenge due to practical needs, while the event seeks to highlight values beyond consumption. Continue reading Minnesota Faith Leaders Urge Residents to Observe “Sacred Friday” by Absolutely Not Going to Target

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
Politics, Satire, Transportation, Urban Absurdity

Waze Announces New Celebrity Voices: Minneapolis Mayor Jacob Frey and Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson to Guide Drivers Through Chaos

Waze has introduced two new navigation voices, Minneapolis Mayor Jacob Frey and Supreme Court Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson, aiming to reflect modern driving experiences filled with confusion and detours. Frey offers calm reassurances for lost drivers, while Jackson invites philosophical reflections on navigation. This update seeks user feedback for a more ambiguous, yet comforting, driving experience. Continue reading Waze Announces New Celebrity Voices: Minneapolis Mayor Jacob Frey and Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson to Guide Drivers Through Chaos

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
Cultural Meltdowns, Culture & Absurdity, Satire, Urban Absurdity

Nation Honors MLK by Arguing All Day About What He Really Would’ve Thought

On Martin Luther King Jr. Day, Americans from both political sides projected their views onto King’s legacy, with conservatives and progressives each claiming his support for their agendas. Corporations joined in with generic emails, while historians faced disregard. The day became a spectacle of ideological conflict, overshadowing King’s true message of unity and understanding. Continue reading Nation Honors MLK by Arguing All Day About What He Really Would’ve Thought

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment