DELAWARE — Democratic leaders erupted in outrage Monday after Donald Trump confirmed that a U.S. military drone had obliterated a small remote-control boat formerly being operated by Joe Biden along a quiet Delaware beach.

Trump defended the strike by insisting he had “credible intelligence” that the vessel was a “narcotics boat,” despite multiple witnesses noting it was approximately 18 inches long, powered by AA batteries, and decorated with a tiny American flag sticker peeling off the stern.

“Look, folks, it looked suspicious,” Trump told reporters. “Low-profile craft. No transponder. Zig-zagging erratically. That’s cartel behavior. Very nasty stuff. I made the call. Best call. Some people are saying the best call ever.”

According to Pentagon sources, the drone pilot initially hesitated after zooming in and reportedly observing Biden crouched near the shoreline with a handheld controller, repeatedly muttering, “C’mon, man,” while steering the boat in small circles. The hesitation ended after Trump allegedly asked, “Is the boat fast? If it’s fast, that’s drugs.”

Democrats Demand Accountability — and a Playtime Ceasefire

Democratic lawmakers quickly condemned the strike, calling it “a reckless escalation,” “an abuse of military power,” and “deeply traumatizing to anyone who has ever owned a toy.”

“This was a peaceful recreational vessel engaged in non-hostile splashing,” said Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer. “The former president was enjoying a simple, wholesome afternoon. Now the beach smells like melted plastic and regret.”

House Democrats announced plans to introduce the Toy Maritime Safety and Demilitarization Act, which would prohibit the use of Hellfire missiles on objects purchasable at Hobby Lobby.

“This is not what our Founders intended,” said Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. “First it’s toy boats. Tomorrow it’s model trains.”

Trump: “Frankly, It Could’ve Been Worse”

Trump, for his part, remained unapologetic, noting that Biden was “very lucky” the strike didn’t occur while the toy was “possibly launching tiny submarines.”

“We showed incredible restraint,” Trump said. “I had people saying, ‘Sir, you should carpet bomb the beach.’ I said no. One drone. Very precise. Beautiful explosion.”

When asked whether he regretted the decision after learning the boat was a toy, Trump shrugged. “A lot of people are saying toys are how they test you. Ever hear of Trojan Horses? Same thing. Only wetter.”

Biden Reportedly ‘Shaken But Fine’

Sources close to Biden say the former president was unharmed but visibly shaken, later seen staring at the ocean while Secret Service agents attempted to console him with ice cream and assurances that “the drone is gone now.”

“He just wanted to see if the little propeller still worked,” said one aide. “Now he keeps asking if the Navy is mad at him.”

The White House has not commented on whether Trump will replace Biden’s boat, though aides confirmed he has been advised to “stick to kites” for the foreseeable future.

Meanwhile, Trump ended his remarks by reassuring Americans that the country remains safe. “We can’t take chances,” he said. “If it floats, it might be fentanyl.”