By Michael Phillips, Political Party Animals Editor-at-Beats
You might remember Lucifer “Justin Case” Everylove from his historic 2024 presidential run—if not from C-SPAN, then at least from that unforgettable foam party in the abandoned Burlington Coat Factory off I-270.
As the editor of Political Party Animals, I was there every step of the way. I covered Everylove when mainstream media wouldn’t. While CNN asked if he was “legally allowed to do that with a fog machine,” I was documenting his grassroots strategy—built on dubstep, decentralization, and divine cosmic downloads.
I saw a candidate who didn’t just walk into town halls. He moonwalked. Who didn’t dodge questions—he beat-matched them into melodic coherence. Who, in one legendary debate in Milwaukee, answered a foreign policy question entirely through interpretive dance.
And somehow, it made sense.
A Leader Maryland Deserves
Now, after a period of soul-searching (and actual cave-dwelling), Everylove is back—and I say this not just as a journalist, but as a Marylander: we need him.
Our state is floundering under the weight of stale leadership and flavorless policy. Wes Moore talks about bold leadership, but when was the last time he dropped a beat so hard it cracked potholes on Route 50?
Everylove is the boldness. He is the drop. And Maryland is the dance floor.
Why He’s Ready
During his presidential run, skeptics said he was unserious. A novelty. A vibe without a policy. But let me remind you:
- He negotiated a ceasefire between two rival EDM collectives during a lightning storm at Burning Man.
- He convinced four libertarians and three Marxists to co-author a unity platform over a game of laser tag.
- He built a coalition of ravers, yogis, truckers, veterans, and permaculture enthusiasts—all on nothing but vibes and veggie samosas.
These are not the achievements of a mere performer. They’re the feats of a statesman.
The Call to Action
Maryland is at a crossroads. One path leads to more bureaucracy, pothole commissions, and solemn speeches about “innovation zones” that never actually innovate. The other path leads to a fully lit Annapolis, where policy is passed to the rhythm of justice, and governance feels like dancing barefoot through dew-covered grass at sunrise.
Everylove’s time is now. He has waited in the shadows of fog machines, beneath the mirrorball of destiny, to answer the call.
As someone who chronicled his presidential rise—and yes, occasionally wore a full panda suit to his press conferences—I can tell you: this man is ready.
He’s not left. He’s not right. He’s laser-aligned.
Final Thoughts
If you want a Maryland that dares to dream, that dances past partisanship, that pulses with purpose and policy—then you already know the answer.
Lucifer “Justin Case” Everylove.
Let’s Make Maryland Rave Again.
Paid for by the Political Party Animals PAC and the Maryland Ministry of Bass.
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